Reflections

My auntie finally passed away last week, the day after I left for France. I'm really glad I had so much time with her. Actually I've had an incredible education staying here with the Seniors. When auntie was hospitalised the first time, and she was really sick, I was freaking out. But staying among people who have lost friends and spouses and, frankly, know that they don't have another 50, or even 15, years left, is very interesting. They get that life comes to a close. They are accepting of that. It is what it is, right?One of my auntie's good friends is also very ill, and has been given just a bit more time to live. She is really ok with that, been labelling things in her apartment to give to others, and all that. Her daughter was really upset about her mom's imminent death, so I told her to come and stay here for a couple weeks. It is amazing how you learn to accept that death will come when you are around people who feel that way. It's not morbid or anything, rather just a graceful acceptance.For the last few weeks I've just felt that as long as she was comfortable, I didn't mind if she stayed on, or just fell asleep and didn't wake up. I absolutely could not tolerate her struggling for breath or anything horrible like that (which she didn't do very much, thank God), but just hanging out in hospital was fine by me. She was 85, she was happy with the life she lived, her body was tired, she's been lonely since her husband died. There was nothing else she wanted to do. I'm really ok with this because she was really ok with this. Still, the funeral and stuff will be an ordeal though.