Babysitting

Most of my friends don't leave me alone with their kids, unless they are desperate...or slightly medicated. And when I am left with their charges, the bar is set low - just keep the little darlings alive.

Yesterday, I was shopping Glanville and her 2 sweetie-pie kids, and we were about to leave the outlet mall. I grabbed a coffee and a bottle of discount wine while she got the kids in their car seats. She was like, "What??? Half price wine? Hang on, stay with the kids, I gotta get some!" (She was apparently in the desperate category...)

So 2 minutes after she left, Fletcher, aged 3, said, "I have to pee."
Could he wait? No, of course not. He's 3.
I didn't know what to do, since I didn't want to get Baby Banksy out of her car seat, but I couldn't leave her alone and take Fletch, and I couldn't send him alone to find his mom in the wine store...

Flash of brilliance!!

"Fletch, you can pee on the tire! MEN pee on tires!"
So I got him out of his car seat, he whipped down his pants, and started peeing, but it was falling short. "Fletch, you're not getting the tire. You gotta pee on the tire!"
So that little bugger, natural as anything, arched his back and flexed his wee bum, and got the pee right to the dead middle of the wheel!! WHOO HOO!

"Hey Fletch, what are you gonna tell your dad tonight?"
"That I peed on the tire of the van."
"That's right. Good job."

Life skills no extra charge with my babysitting services.