A Cow Story

Yesterday, I ran 20 miles. (The longest run of my life. 4 weeks till the race.) At about the 14 mile mark, we came across some cows on a hill. As soon as they saw us, they started running away. I started shouting at the cows, "Oh #*!$ you! You're just running to show that you can go faster than us. #*!$ you cows!"
[You run 14 miles, and see if you don't shout at anything and everything - except your running partners.]
So one of them stopped, and turned to face us. Uh oh. Then 3 more stopped, stood their ground, and stared at us, with menace in their eyes. I expected, "Are you talking to me? Are you talking to me?!" Next it would be like The Matrix, and one would lift a hoof, to beckon me forward to a kung-fu duel! Yikes, scary!
We managed to get away without anything getting worse, but still expecting a bovine ambush, probably with 3 bottles on their hooves, like in Warriors. "Run-ners, come out and pla-aaay."
[all the oxygenated blood in my body is in my legs at that point. I got NUTHIN in my brain.]

At the end of the run, we were having a picnic in the shade, and I was laughing about telling the cows to #*!$ off. I looked up on the hill, and saw more were RUNNING down the hill, toward us. OK, I have learned my lesson. I will not swear at cows anymore! I am gonna get my ass whooped!